Pains In The Butt
Clamshell packaging: the box that defeats the customer to defeat the thief
Rigid plastic welded shut around a small item is a loss-prevention device, and you are the one holding the scissors.
Pains In The Butt
Traffic, queues, packaging, hold music — the everyday irritations nobody writes down.
13 articles · updated August 11, 2026 · page 1 of 2
Pains In The Butt
Hold music is not an apology, it is a queue management tool
The loop, the reassurances and the periodic voice are all tuned against one number: how long you will wait before hanging up.
More in Pains In The Butt
Pains In The Butt
The traffic jam with no crash in it
A queue can form on an empty stretch of motorway with no obstruction anywhere. The cause is behind you, several minutes ago.
Pains In The Butt
They moved the bread again, and they know exactly where they moved it
Supermarket layouts are rearranged deliberately and periodically. The disorientation is not a side effect of the change, it is most…
Pains In The Butt
One queue beats five, and the maths is not close
A single line feeding several servers is faster and fairer than separate lines. Almost everyone still chooses the shortest one they…
Pains In The Butt
We attempted delivery, says the card, from a van that never stopped
Delivery windows, attempt records and collection points are shaped by how couriers are paid, which is per parcel and against a…
Pains In The Butt
You cannot hear anybody in this restaurant and that is the decor
Hard floors, bare tables and exposed ceilings look excellent in photographs and turn conversation into shouting.
Pains In The Butt
Nine minutes: the snooze button and the sleep you did not get
Fragmented waking produces a specific kind of grogginess, and the button that promises more rest reliably delivers less of it.
Pains In The Butt
Shoes off, laptop out, liquids in a bag you have to buy
Airport screening queues are shaped by throughput per lane, a rule set written after specific incidents, and a person deciding…
Pains In The Butt
The hand dryer that dries the wall and the queue behind you
Public washroom design optimises for cleaning cost and vandalism resistance, which is why nothing in it works well for the person…
Pains In The Butt
Addressed to the occupier, which is the point of the whole thing
Unaddressed leaflets sidestep the opt-out registers that stop addressed mail, which is precisely why they are used.
Pains In The Butt
The neighbour has a leaf blower and a strong sense of Saturday
Noise complaints fail because the rules measure the wrong things, and the wrong things are the ones that are easy to measure.